Osteops are a bit likes cows, but not at all. They are totally different to cows, apart from their milk, which is delicious. They can be domesticated and it’s pretty easy to milk them. Most doctors recommend one glass of osteop milk per day, to be drunk between 7 and 8 am.

Large herds of wild osteops inhabit the foothills of The Foothills. Their milk is legendary. When osteops move up to higher terrain, their milk is not so great.

Osteops lay eggs in batches of 6. The eggs hatch after 1 month. Mother osteops become violent during the entire laying-to-hatching period so must be avoided at all costs. A lady by the name of Dorothea Afikomen once approached an Osteop just as the eggs were hatching. Dorothea Afikomen was never seen again.

The Great Osteop Stampede of 1999 was a stampede of osteops. It was in 1999. Over 30,000 osteops converged at the muster station at sunrise, and began a southbound stampede when the stampede bugle sounded at 6am.

Stampede distance: 8 miles
Stampede winner: Osteop #17,434
Stampeded dust-cloud seen from distance of: 74 miles

It is possible to ride Osteops. Mr. Grodzinsky is actually a very good rider and is considering introducing osteop racing as a new school sport. It will be debated before the Swedhump Elementary CSLHSC (Curriculum, Sport & Leisure Health & Safety Sub Committee) next month.

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