Wobblethorpe (Mrs.)

Teaches: Bed-Jumping
Major Accomplishments: Used to own the World’s Second-Most Amazing Hotel, has jumped on over 32,000 beds.
Loves: Hotels

When she was young

Little Weronika Wobblethorpe has hotels in her blood. Her parents were both in the hotel business. She was born in a hotel and grew up in a hotel (which is where she learnt to jump on beds so well). When her little friends all had regular doll houses, she had a doll hotel. All her clothes were hotel-themed and her middle name is actually Hotel. Weronika Hotel Wobblethorpe. Can you believe it?

She had a puppy called Hotel, a cat called Hotel, and three goldfish all called Hotel. Every meal she ever ate until the age of seven was delivered by room service. Every book in her bookshelf was either about a hotel, or written in a hotel. Every now and then, but VERY rarely, she’d read one about a motel. But only without her parents’ knowledge. And she’d hide these books in the back of the shelf.

Her favorite color was…hotel! It is actually a color. It’s an off-grey mixed with a hint of more grey, and a smidgen of beige. It’s really lovely.

By age five she was already one of the best bed-jumpers, worldwide, in her age group.
By age fifteen she had won the Bed-Jumping World-Championships.

She used the prize money, 23 million dollars, to build the ground floor of her new hotel, The Grand Wobblethorpe Regency. So spectacular was the ground floor (we’ll explain it below), that she was quickly able to get investors to pay for the other 149 floors. Within two years it had been voted The Second Best Hotel in the world. We are not in a position right now to tell you which hotel won.

The first floor had just one bedroom. A VERY luxurious one. Attached to the room was a private pool, ice-rink, roller-disco mini waterslide park, Wobble-Ball track, art room, zip-line emporium and triplocopter-port. It also featured a bird sanctuary, butterfly zone, thirteen waterfalls and a MASSIVE chocolate self-serve area.

The pool itself had a powerful temperature control, and could be turned into a hot tub or snow zone withing fifteen minutes.

Room service was done by drone, and the menu had over 32,000 different options.

Using the button console on the bed, guest could order live dancers, an ant choir, a regular human choir as well as theatrical performances of their choice.

A push of button D would result in a glass capsule enclosing the bed itself, and the guest would then choose various different options to experience from within the glass.

Options included Safari park, Aquarium, Blizzard (with snow bears) and Ocean Crossing.

This floor became the blueprint for all the other floors.

No wonder it it’s an award-winning hotel.

< Back to Almanac