Grimstead (Ms.)

Teaches: Library
Former Chief Library Officer of the UNRLEAM (the United Nations Royal Library of Everything & More). For that job she had to memorise the exact locations of 32 billion and 7 books.
She has a lump on her head which sometimes throbs.

It is not known whether she was born with the lump, or whether it just emerged in later years.

Ms. Grimstead has been obsessed with lists and keeping things in order since she was very young. When she was just 4, little Ermintrude Grimstead got her first filing cabinet. She started storing all her drawings it in. When she was 5 she got her first bookshelf. When she was 6 she got 2 new bookshelves and 7 filing cabinets. For her seventh birthday her parents, who were very rich, built an extension on to their home to create more space for Ermintrude’s fast-expanding archive and library.

By the time she was 8, she had a part-time job at the local library. By the time she was 9 she was Chief Librarian. By age 10 she had already finished her high school diploma (she was an excellent student) and applied for a National Libarianship Fellowship Ship Scholarship. This scholarship pays the full 4-year tuition and all expenses for a 4-year cruise on the National Libarianship Fellowship Ship. Ms. Grimstead did not win the full scholarship but did win a place on the boat. To make up the financial shortfall, she took on various regular crew positions on the vessel, like deck-cleaning, navigation, polishing of the lifeboats, and licking the compass clean before every watch.

After 4 years of sailing, the National Libarianship Fellowship Ship came back to port, and in front of the world’s journalists, it was announced that Ms. Grimstead came top of the class, and would officially become Assistant Chief Library Officer of the UNRLEAM (the United Nations Royal Library of Everything & More).

Three years later the (left-handed) Chief Library Officer got stung by a Grobsnot and was forced into early retirement due to the severe and prolonged allergic reaction. Ms. Grimstead replaced her. Finally, the second most sought-after librarian position in the world was hers.

5 years later she was approached by Mrs. Rosebank to come and work at Swedhump Elementary’s library (for sure the most coveted librarian position on the planet), and the rest is history.

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