Armadillo Cake

Totally, totally, totally, totally, totally, totally, totally, totally, totally, totally, totally, delicious armadillo-flavored cake. Shaped like an armadillo.

Come in eight sizes:

[1] Very large
[2] Large
[3] Large medium
[4] Medium medium
[5] Small medium
[6] Small
[7] Tiny
[8] Microscopic

The last two sizes are not really worth getting, except for your ants.

Armadillo cakes are not easy to make, and we would not suggest trying at home. What happened to Roger Finkle-Finkle Hummer-Garten is a cautionary tale.

Roger Finkle-Finkle Hummer-Garten fancied himself as a level 14 cook and a level 17 baker. He actually was good, but not above level 12 in either category. Anyway, one Saturday Roger Finkle-Finkle Hummer-Garten decided he was going to bake an armadillo cake. He got all the ingredients together, but didn’t read the instructions on the bottle of the armadillo compound. As a result, he put in two drops too many. And of course you know what happens when that happens. Yep, it happened. Big time. It was actually quite unbelievable. People in that part of town still talk about it to this day.

The best Armadillo cakes are baked by JJBCI (Jezebel Jefelonius Bakeries Corporation Incorporated), and they do home deliveries. Jezebel Jefelonius herself oversees the administration of armadillo compound into every single cake that gets baked in the factory, and their safety record is impeccable.